Points to Consider before “JUDGING” someone..!!

“When we generalize and judge people quickly without taking ample time, we’ve chosen a shortcut. It’s superficial of us, and a lack of wisdom.” – Assegid Habtewold.

…In this Millennial world, people are connected to each other effortlessly, thanks to all the social media platforms we adhere to!… we are prone to perceive new issues, events, articles from around the world just by scrolling the news feed.. also, this happens to be the most accessible platform to judge people. Giving out judgement or framing an opinion on someone, on the basis of his/her appearance or surroundings has become a part of our mundane lifestyle!

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Oh my god!! that horrible looking girl, who was my classmate in high school is now an international model?? Who hired her??..she might be having some bias connections with them!!..what does this statement conclude?? Some person is judging a girl who was not so good looking, is now an International model, does that makes sense?? Instead of getting an inspiration  from her, people stopped for a minute and did nothing but judged her!

Many of you, rather I would say all of you have belittled someone or other person in your entire life..yes we do it..even I do it..Disha does it. I know its very embarrassing when we come to terms that we are actually judging a person. We don’t know what the person’s story is or what has he been through, but we can’t stop ourselves judging that person..you know why?? Because it so easy to do it, we don’t have that much courtesy to put in our energy in learning about that person or deriving good thoughts for him. We are dragged into the pool of assumptions and criticism.

“There are some people who, in reality, do not know why they judge others, yet, they keep judging others from dawn to dusk! That is pure ignorance!” 
―  Ernest Agyemang Yeboah.

As we are discussing this topic, I remember a story which I had read numerous times, even you might have, but whenever I read it, it strikes me..all the judgements I made in my entire life gives me goosebumps of embarrassments!

A few years ago, a 24 year old boy seeing out from the train’s window shouted…

“Dad, look the trees are going behind us!”

As his Dad smiled,  a young couple sitting nearby, looked at the 24 year old’s childish behavior with pity, when suddenly he again exclaimed…

“Dad, look the clouds are running with us!”

The couple couldn’t resist and said to the old man…

“Why don’t you take your son to see a good doctor?”

The old man smiled and said…

“I did and we are just coming from the hospital, my son was blind from birth and he just got his eyes today.”
Wasn’t that story something to learn from..?? Every person on earth has a personal story, it might be unpleasant and that is certainly the reason he is behaving in an unfamiliar way. Without knowing the story behind his unusual act we tend to frame opinion towards him which is unhealthy for that person as well as for us!  

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There is no immediate cure for this disease of criticizing others, but we can try to take a step towards sojourning this pattern by considering few points before creating a judgmental statement in our mind!

Cut out the embarrassment!

As I discussed the above story, when we tend to judge a person due to his unlike behavior, and we realize the fact behind his uncanny attitude, we feel embarrassed….we question our ruthless thoughts, we feel sorry for ourselves and apologize for our judgmental attitude. Make an effort to ask the person about the reason behind his ill behavior or read about that person before going on that judging spree!!

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It hurts!

We unknowingly hurt people by our judgements. Even if you are judged by someone, and when you encounter this criticism cast on you..you feel bad. Some people can take it, some may not..you might not know that you are adding up to the anxiety that person is facing in his entire life, which might turn into worst situations. So, control your judgmental thoughts, put yourself in his shoes and for sure, you won’t hurt yourself!

Loneliness gives birth to judgments!

Everyone wishes some spice or entertainment in their life, no one want’s to be lonely, so we reach out to join people who form opinions for others, be it school, college or workplace. It’s so easy to grab a laugh with bunch of people framing judgements about that one person who does not fit to be with those stereotypes or is least interested to join them! Avoid doing this, get some other alternatives, do something productive, grab a coffee, spend some alone time, it will surely kill that loneliness without being part of such false showbiz!

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We fall prey to judging ourselves!

It happens many times, in front of mirror when you are puzzled, what to wear or which hairstyle to adorn not because of comfortness or fashion, the first thing that runs into our mind is the fear of the perception which people will create when they would notice us, will it be good or bad?? This thoughts unknowingly starts to form judgments towards our self for the reason that we tend to judge people on their looks, outfits, etc. Hence, by stopping to judge people we help ourselves from this vicious cycle of criticism!

Look for positive!

The most intricate point is, we need to disregard the negative and look towards the positive. If that girl was ugly, but she is now an international model, then that signifies she has put into enormous amount of hard work and zeal to achieve that success. Get the inspiration from her, make the most of the situation from other’s life. This will make you feel motivated in achieving your goals, your passions!!

“Who was I to judge
the heart which broke
into that moment,
spilling kindness and longing?
Who was I to dismiss
her story
because I did not know it?”
― Edwina Gateley.

Judging is easy, not judging might be simpler, but you haven’t been at the other side of the wall. These humble initiatives plays a foremost role towards being a better person. Try it out and see the positive difference you create for yourself!

Leave a comment..if you found this helpful..feel free to add your points..stay tuned for more inspiring posts..love ya..!

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